Yenta Tellabenta, Behind the Scenes

Hello my dawlinks!  It's your Yenta.  OK, truth be told, it's actually _____ (name removed to protect identity, one of Mardy's stipulations for non professionals writing, though temporarily we published the name here so none of the followers and FB friends would feel 'fooled', and the family and others could see that indeed, this was their live or virtual world friend, loved one, family member. Credit where credit is due, but people ultimately are on a journey with chronic illness and their identities and responsibilities and roles in life need to be managed with the proper priorities being on THEIR wellness and not what's going to play best on a website for readership. Our forums have benefitted from the participation of people who have chronic conditions and are proactively working to get from where they are to 'improved' and ultimately we would hope, 'well'). 

Yenta is an "alter ego" of sorts you might say.  She's actually the personification of my mother, Shirley who really existed and was 78 years old when I began writing on Lumigrate as "Yenta". She really did speak Yiddish, really was married to Moisha (as Grandma Merril called him), and who's father (Papa) really was a butcher during WWII. 

The dog training stuff belonged to my father (Moisha), whose name was actually Mike.  Yenta's topic/story about the young man training with the K-9 unit related to airport security unit is true.  I was referring to my father who really did train dogs for therapy as well as obedience, search and rescue, protection (which he didn't like doing), and assistance.   

But that's not why you're reading this, is it.  Yenta was created through conversations between myself and Mardy in the late summer or fall of 2009, in Lumigrate's first year.  In my almost 50 years of life (so far and G-d willing there should be more), I have found some very solid and "wise" (as Mardy calls it) ways of being and thinking. 

We would discuss many things and she'd call me her Jewish Mother.  With that I'd fall into the typical accent one might hear and try to gently give sage advice.  That's where Yenta comes from.  For those that don't know, Yenta means "Town Gossip" in Yiddish.  Remember those 613 commandments that were mentioned by Yenta in a topic / story?  Gossiping is one of those we shouldn't do and yes, it's a commandment.

About me?  I was born and raised in NY (not the city), married in 1990 and was lucky enough to have a son, who graduated high school the same month my mother's life ended. He went to college just after his father and I separated and our divorce was final just as spring was about to arrive in 2012. When my son was 2, I was diagnosed with (a) rare autoimmune illness (why not!) that will never go away and "will progressively get worse if we don't lessen the effects immediately" I was told.  This is when we found out my immune system was farkakt (lousy).  Oops!  So I was told I need to live some place warm and my then-husband was more than happy to move us to Florida.  I don't think I've ever seen anyone pack up a house faster than he did!

I had to leave the family, friends, job and support system behind and got smacked in the face with depression.  Nasty, almost crippling, three year long, horrific depression.  I was functional and nothing more.  Then came the diagnosis of FMS/fibromyalgia.  Let's just pile something else on, shall we?  I travelled from one therapist to another, one "rheumy" to another, one holistic healer to another. I was grabbing at anyone that I thought would be helpful when it finally dawned on me: what I needed wasn't outside of me, it was inside.  I didn't need anyone else, I needed me.  And that's where it began, and is still an unfolding process.  

To this day, I live knowing every day is new. I give myself little cheers for everything I accomplish from brushing my teeth to getting in my car. I have to remember the sun shines inside me and I have to let it out, and to do a mitzvah (a good deed) no matter how small, every day.  I greet everyone the same way a dog does (minus the licking tongue of course).  You should see me at work!  Oh yes, I work part time as a cashier at a supermarket, and opted to not take full disibility when granted that from our system. 

Now you know about me and why I enjoy being part of the writers with chronic illness sharing at Lumigrate. I hope Yenta makes you smile!  It couldn't hurt!

Your

Yenta